Cloud Nine Compliment

I just got back from my electricity and magnetism lab. And I'm the happiest I've ever been all summer.

I know. It sounds like an oxymoron. But tonight was special.

My professor is from somewhere in Africa. I've inferred that he had a very challenging and strict education there. It shows in how he teaches, and his expectations of us. 

He has been particularly hard on me sometimes. He has stood over me while I'm working a problem in class and watched me work. It's intimidating. He will ask me to calculate stuff for him in front of the whole class. He was even pretty harsh toward me and humiliated me in front of everyone the other week for getting a wrong answer to a problem we worked in class. 

But tonight he really redeemed himself.

I was finishing up the lab with my lab partners. My professor casually walked over and asked me what my major is. 

"Mechanical engineering," I replied.

He smiled. "Mechanical engineering? Go for it," he said. "You can do it." And he patted me on the back.

First of all, I never expected him of all people to compliment me. Second, that's one of the best compliments I've ever received in my life.

It means a lot to me because this is a tough major. It's very easy to doubt yourself and feel inadequate. You feel it most when you get a bad test grade in a difficult class. You feel it when you don't understand something at first and feel lost in class. You feel it when you compare yourself to others who you know that this is definitely the right major for them. 

And it doesn't even end there for me. It's another level of challenges being a girl in engineering. You feel very singled-out and isolated. Like the elephant in the room. The odd one out. And you may be able to do what all the boys can do, but you still face opposition in quiet ways. Unfortunately, there are also still people out there who don't believe girls can be engineers. That engineering is "a man's profession". So you feel that pressure also. 

But for someone with a Ph.D. to recognize my abilities and tell me that I am good enough to be an engineer, to be what I want to be, is moving. This class has been challenging, and that makes it even more meaningful. It makes me feel like I can do this, you know? It's really easy to wish I was in an easier major with more girls. But I love mechanical engineering. It's what I want to do. And now, I finally have someone who has verbalized that he believes I am capable of achieving what I want. 

I'm on cloud nine. I'm not here often. But when I am, it changes me for the better.