Fresh Goals

Well, my first day of college is here. Here, as in, today. Like, right now.

I've thought about this day for many years. I've envisioned this day occurring on at least 10 different campuses. I've imagined feeling about 20 different emotions. But above all, I envisioned how amazing it would feel to have high school finally behind me.

Today feels very different from how I imagined, as I suppose most things do. Yes, it's nice knowing I'm not going back to a place I hate, but oddly, it feels barely relevant now. Honestly, I really haven't thought about high school since before I graduated. Instead, I feel pretty neutral, with a big pinch of anxiety.

It's a little disappointing to me to not feel some sort of extreme excitement like so many of my friends and other college freshmen do. My problem is petty--this is not the exact situation I wanted, and I haven't gotten completely over it, even four months later. I know. I need to grow up and accept life's unfortunate twists. But for some reason, I can't accept this one. Not just yet.

Regardless, I've got some things I want to accomplish this year, and I might as well share them to see if I actually do fulfill all of them by May 2015.

- Make new friends
- Volunteer more
- Try new sports
- Get involved in a club or two
- Keep a solid GPA
- Attempt to get an internship for the summer
- Have more fun
- Create great experiences

Basically, my ultimate goal this year is to still remain serious about my education, but also be serious about enjoying life (I realize that's an oxymoron). One of my favorite quotes right now is: "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live," said by Albus Dumbledore in the Harry Potter series. That's what I want this year to be like. I spent the latter half of high school so focused on dreams that I forced myself to not truly live, and in the end, the dreams just crushed me anyway, and I wished I had just had more fun. I don't want to be miserable again, and that's why I'm glad college is here. College seems to offer many opportunities for fun, and I plan to take advantage of that, for sure. In moderation, of course.

So, here we go. Wish me luck. Or rather, wish me fun.